Kid Temper Tantrum Attempts Real Life Happy Wheels Again

Kids having atmosphere tantrums tin be hard to manage.  Like really difficult.  They are full of so many emotions and become totally casuistic.

They can't tell u.s. why they are upset, and they become upset over the smallest things.

Frequently times nosotros get frustrated trying to deal with these out of control, yelling children.  So if we are out in public, we can get even more emotional considering of the watching eyes of strangers.

No affair how well behaved a child is, every kid is going to accept tantrums now and again.

But one time nosotros sympathize why kids have temper tantrums we can more than effectively help our kids through them.

Why Kids Have Temper Tantrums

Kids have temper tantrums considering the parts of their brain that allows them to call up logically isn't adult yet.

Brains aren't fully developed until our mid-twenties, and the concluding part that develops is the frontal lobe, which is the abstract thinking part.  Information technology'south the part that helps us remember earlier we act and information technology's where nosotros problem solve.  Teenagers and immature adults make such impulsive, and dare I say, stupid decisions because this office of the brain merely isn't fully developed yet.  They don't think earlier they act.

Information technology's also why young children are even more than impulsive and emotional than teenagers.  Their brains but aren't every bit developed as adult brains.

When something happens that upsets them, even when information technology'south something small, their limbic organization activates.   The limbic system controls our emotions and memories.

At that place is no thinking or problem solving in the limbic organisation, it is pure emotions and impulses.

When a child is having a temper tantrum, their limbic systems is fully activated and their frontal lobe isn't adult enough to help them think clearly virtually what upset them.

So now that we know what's going on in their brain.  How practise nosotros stop the tantrum?

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How to Stop a Temper Tantrum in it'south Tracks

I've listed a few means to handle temper tantrums with kids. Remember that every child is different and some techniques will work better for some kids than others.

By the way…all of these techniques work for ANXIETY too because anxious feelings are also based in the limbic organization

Reflect Their Emotions

One of the quickest, nigh effective ways to stop a atmosphere tantrum, and connect with your child, is to meet them in their limbic organisation.  Connect with the emotions first and then talk about the problem.

When a person's encephalon is flooded with emotions, nosotros can't speak logically to them and look logical answers.

Have you ever tried maxim things like:

"What practise you need?"

"Why are you crying?"

"Apply your words and talk to me"

"Tell me what happened"

Did this stop the tantrum?  Probably not.

When we brand these statements, we are talking to the logical part of our kids brains.

The problem is that our kids are not functioning in the logical part of their brain during a temper tantrum.  They can't answer our questions because they are likewise emotionally flooded to recollect logically.

The all-time, and easiest way to finish the tantrum, is to connect with their emotional encephalon, because that is where their brain is currently functioning and engaged.

To do this, take a await at the situation and at your child.  Figure out HOW they are feeling and reflect that back to them.

"Wow, that made you so mad"

"Oh, I see you're really distressing about that"

"That hurt your feelings"

"Grrr!  You're so ANGRY!"

"Information technology's and so disappointing!"

Statements similar these let your child know that you are paying attention and that you see that they are upset.  You lot're talking to them in a way that they can hear you.

Frequently times, the child will respond to these statements equally "yes, that did injure my feelings" or "Yes, I'm mad!".   And Boom!  Yous accept their attention!

Y'all might take to make several of these statements earlier they hear you, just eventually information technology will work.

Giving a hug or bear on might besides help testify them that you are paying attention.Notation:  Some children (similar adults) do not similar to be touched when they are upset.

In one case you get their attention and connect with them, you tin and then start asking questions and dealing with the problem at hand.

Wait it out

When my son is throwing a fit and is comfortless, I sit down quietly with him and just wait it out.  He's a hugger and likes physical touch, and then I sit with him in my artillery and wait for him to calm down.  I usually talk to him about the way he's feeling and let him know that I'k in that location whenever he's ready to talk.

Sometimes I'll transport him to his room to calm down.  I usually do this when I'grand frustrated and mad and demand some altitude myself.  When I can't approach him in a loving way, then I either need to remove myself or remove him.  I practise both, depending on the state of affairs.

Notice Your Reactions Too

The calmer you are, the calmer your child will be.

1. Lower your vocalisation, whisper.
2. Go down on their level (face up to face) so you tin connect with them and be less intimidating.
3. Take deep breaths and stay cool
4. Proceed information technology in perspective.  You child is having a hard time, not giving you a hard time.

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Source: https://messymotherhood.com/handling-temper-tantrums-with-kids/